Note: My spiritual journal still resides here but I will also be publishing each post on the blog as well.
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MARCH 30, 2016–Today’s readings put forth a common theme–that we need each other. I loved the line from the meditation found at The Word Among Us website:
“There’s something about opening ourselves to other people that makes us more open to the Lord’s presence and his comfort.”
The meditation cites the examples of the two disciples walking to Emmaus, pouring themselves out to Jesus even though they did not recognize him. What they did recognize was his openness to their plight. He was willing to listen.
It also discusses the reading from Acts where Peter and John “give what they have” to the lame beggar–the healing power of Christ.
The meditation concludes with the idea that we most often find God in one another.
Such discovery requires trust. I have to go out on a limb based upon my initial feelings about someone, and trust that they want to hear what I have to say.
It makes me think about the vibe I give out–does my face convey openness, or am I annoyed that you are bothering me? Am I sitting still and being attentive or am I fidgeting? Is my mind focused on you or pushing in the future, waiting for you to leave?
It’s not easy to trust. It’s a lot easier on my part to think that my problem is so “special” that no one will understand it and so I keep it to myself. That’s a form of pride. There is no problem that is unique to one individual. At least one other person in the world has been through my problems. If I go out on a limb and confide in another, will I find God waiting there to listen?
Remember what it was like to lay sprawled out on the floor surrounded by crayons, markers and pencils, filling in the pages of your favorite coloring book?
After finishing a picture, I would hold it up, admire my work and run to show it to my mom and dad.
I had the distinct pleasure of being interviewed for CatholicTV’s flagship program, “This is the Day” this past Friday regarding River of Grace. The lovely Kate Andrews conducted the interview and we had a wonderful conversation about losses and the grief journey, and how every person is blessed with creativity through the Holy Spirit.
The show will air for the first time on Friday, May 27th at 10:30 and rebroadcasts Friday at 7:30pm, Saturday at 4:30am and 5:30pm and the following Monday at 12am. It will be available online anytime during that period at http://www.catholictv.com/shows/this-is-the-day.
We talked about both River of Grace and Louisa May Alcott: Illuminated by The Message, focusing on how Alcott became my grief counselor and the catalyst which jump started my creative life.
Erin conducted a wonderful in-depth interview which truly reveals the essence of both books.
As soon as this podcast is available, I will post the date.
I am grateful to CatholicTV and to Erin for giving voice to River of Grace and Louisa May Alcott: Illuminated by The Message.
I haven’t known a book to affect me so profoundly as My Name is Asher Lev. The conflict is deep, searing, cutting to the core. It helped me to understand better the nature of being a creative person and the sacrifice it takes to be authentic and honest, even to the point of hurting others. The book is a long, slow burn, every page necessary to set up the final conflict. At the end I was racing through, dreading the end as tears sprung to my eyes and yet terribly curious about how the author would resolve the conflict. How grateful I am that there is a part two, The Gift of Asher Lev, now waiting for me at the library, ready to be picked up in just a few minutes. Continue reading “Book Review: My Name is Asher Lev by Chaim Potok – a soul-searching must for every creative”→
I love St. Paul. And I am a woman. Yes, I am fully aware of the famous passages in which he instructs wives to be “submissive to their husbands” and how they are not to speak in public. I believe these passages need to studied carefully for their true meaning for nothing is ever as it seems, but that’s for another day.
I have a lifelong habit of talking to myself. I don’t consider a thought to be valid unless it is spoken out loud.
I’m that crazy lady you see barreling down the highway with hands waving and a mouth that never stops moving. I do my best brainstorming in the car. I also vent. My face displays my mood for all to see: happy, sad, excited, angry. I am oblivious to anyone around me and so I let loose.
So what possible harm can there be in all that? This has been the lesson of my Lent this year.
While reading a book by Father Vassilios Papavassiliou, a Greek Orthodox priest called Thirty Steps to Heaven: The Ladder of Divine Ascent for All Walks of Life, I came across a chapter titled “Talkativeness and Silence.” There was another chapter further in called “Stillness.” Stillness is something I have long desired but felt I could not achieve. I can’t sit still for one moment without fidgeting nor can I keep my mind from racing. Furthermore, I cannot seem to get out of the prison of myself. These chapters both outlined the problem and offered solutions. The tools are simple to use but the task is impossible without God’s grace.
The chapter on “Talkativeness and Silence” made it clear that talking to myself was often not a good thing. For one thing, it creates noise that blocks communion with God–how can I listen above the din of my own voice? Talking to myself leads me deep within but not to the place where God dwells.
I have a hot temper and am easily aggravated; frequent venting is the result. Such open expression of my anger in private stokes negative feelings that spill over to others. A perfect example is road rage—in my outburst of anger against the driver who supposedly wronged me I judge someone unjustly. The more I rage, the more aggressively I drive to the point where it could endanger others. Road rage sometimes interrupts prayer, severing communion with God. It takes a great deal of effort to restart that conversation.
Cursing to myself happens without a thought. The inability to control that urge in private makes it harder to control my tongue in public, going beyond simple cursing to gossip and hurtful words towards others. Cursing to myself reinforces those behaviors.
Father Papavassiliou is right: “As long as we consider the tongue to be autonomous—something that falls outside the scope of Christian ascesis, something independent of God—it will inevitably become a tool of sin.”
The Scriptures tell us that there’s no such thing as a private sin: “For there is nothing hidden that will not be disclosed, and nothing concealed that will not be known or brought out into the open”–Luke 8:17 (NIV)
You may not talk to yourself but everyone harbors thoughts. Where do those thoughts lead you? How do you express them? There is no thought that will not be revealed in one form or another. Those of us who vocalize our thoughts, even if just to ourselves exacerbate the danger of those thoughts harming someone else.
Conquering a lifetime of venting, lamenting and cursing seems like an impossible task. By my own power–not doable. Through an all merciful and powerful God, it will be done, especially as I humble myself and ask others to pray for me. The grace that comes through those prayers will help to control my tongue. Replacing negative thoughts with remembrances of all the wonderful ways God has blessed me is a powerful way to dispel any negativity.
In asking God for help with my tongue, he has given me a wonderful tool—singing. Father Papavassiliou recommends this too. Therefore, if you see me driving down the Mass Pike, mouth moving and face happy and determined, you may witness me using this tool. The scriptures recommend it: “psalms, hymns, and songs from the Spirit. Sing and make music from your heart to the Lord (Ephesians 5:19, NIV). It does a world of good for my soul, driving out wrongful thoughts. I know it silences my tongue.
For more aids to your Lenten journey, visit the Lenten Resources page for posts, podcasts, music and videos.
They are testing Jesus “so as to bring a charge against him.” They want to be rid of him.
If Jesus answers that the woman ought to be stoned to death, which was the penalty for adultery under Mosaic law, he would be challenging the Roman authorities. The Romans had banned executions without their authority or approval.
If Jesus answers that she not be punished under the penalties imposed by Mosaic law, then Jesus sets himself up in opposition to what Moses prescribed.
So it’s a trap.
But Jesus uses the trap to unmask the hypocrisy of these pious frauds.
These guys are using this woman as a pawn in their scheme to discredit Jesus.
They don’t care about her, or about justice or the even well-being of whatever marriage has been violated.
The leaders are using the woman as a chess-piece.
If they had even a modicum of interest in justice wouldn’t her male accomplice be under scrutiny too? (It did say, she was caught in the act of adultery, didn’t it? The law required the same penalty be meted out to both. But this guy is nowhere to be found. How convenient!)
So Jesus says, “Hey, put down your stones!” Start scrutinizing your own heart before you throw stones of condemnation at others. This whole situation you’re presenting is corrupt and rotten to the core.
The gospel tells us that the religious leaders went way, beginning with eldest.
(Maybe the older ones realized that with the accumulation of years, they had more “scrutinizing” and soul-searching to do.)
The woman is left alone with Jesus. He tells her to stop sinning. “Don’t do this again.”
Just as importantly he tells her: “Neither do I condemn you.” In doing so, he saves her life. And, he gives this woman a new lease on life.
Let’s pray that Jesus’ provocative and courageous actions would inspire us: and accept the simple truth that God, and only God, will be the ultimate judge of every life and of every heart.
In the meantime we can put down the stones of condemnation and redouble our efforts at healing and reconciling whatever is broken in our lives and the lives that cross our path each day.
I am pleased to present this guest post from Father Steven LaBaire, pastor of Holy Family Parish in Worcester, MA.
Today’s gospel reading (John 5:1-16) at the Pool of Bethesda where Jesus heals the man who had been lame for over thirty years struck a familiar chord. In that reading, Jesus asks a most obvious question: “Do you want to be healed?” He sensed that the man having been ill for so long, was stuck in that mode.
The Pool of Bethesda
I remember hearing that question in my head when I had my throat blessed two years ago on the Feast of St. Blaise--that blessing healed my singing voice. Actually my answer to the question at that point was “No!”
Why the heck not??
I no longer wanted the responsibility associated with being a singer. It sounds ridiculous even as I write this but leading the singing at mass each week had become a grind. That’s what happens when you do it too long without a break. It was time to step aside and I used my lack of singing voice to do that. I sure as heck didn’t want my voice to come back–it would take away my excuse!
Eventually I came to understand that it was perfectly okay to take time away. I have only just returned to singing in church but this time as a member of the choir, without the leadership responsibility.
Get that elephant off of me!
Then there was the feeling of being stuck when it came to my weight. I felt like I had an elephant sitting on top of me–loosing weight seemed like an impossibility.
A rare hour spent in church in front of the monstrance changed everything. The grace I received from that time of prayer helped me to gently prod the elephant to move away. He did and I was able to embrace my diet (which is now a chosen lifestyle). I’ve lost 22 of the 27 pounds that I wish to lose. That elephant will not visit me again.
Praying at home
As I wrote in my spiritual journal, “Is My Day Your Day,” Even though I felt the insistent call again and again to stop, be still and pray, I could not get myself to do it. Again, it was time spent in adoration that caused that elephant to move away as well.
True healing
I was healed: my voice came back, I lost the weight, I’ve started praying in my corner each morning and each night.
Healing removes burdens, not just of the physical ailment or stubborn mindset, but of the guilt and attachment associated with those things.
Sometimes it is there for so long that it becomes your identity. It can be a excuse to avoid doing something that is difficult. It definitely requires a truthful assessment of yourself and that can be painful.
All of that was true. But in each case, I experienced transformation. SO worth it!
Not such a simple question is it: “Do you want to be healed?”
For aids to your Lenten journey, visit the Lenten Resources page for posts, podcasts, music and videos.
Click to Tweet & Share: Finding God in others–do we trust each other enough to find him? http://wp.me/p6vomf-1FW
Be as One 